1/11/2024 0 Comments Eldest souls costIn addition, I couldn’t help but note that I had not only lost my birth father, but all of his stories and all of the stories from that side of the family - which was Black, like me. This revelation was hard for me to process, since it was a loss, but one that felt simultaneously distant and immediate. She discovered he had died from injuries he had sustained from a high speed police chase in Palo Alto, California, in 1981, when I was 6. I started seeing a therapist who specializes in adoption issues around this time, and she was able to track down material on my birth father. And, as it turned out, I did not have any biological siblings. She also warned me that he was “dangerous,” that she didn’t trust him, and that they “were both lost souls” at the time they got together. While initially getting to know her, she told me that she had had a very brief relationship with my birth father and couldn’t give me any real information about him beyond his name. Thus began a long, complicated, on-again and off-again relationship with my birth mother, which ended with her death from a rare cancer in 2014. Agency staff wrote that they had been in communication with my birth mother, who had given them permission to share her identity with me, should I ever reach out to them and ask for it. So, I contacted my adoption agency and asked for any “identifying information” they had on file (information that could reveal the identity of one or both of my birth parents). When I was 19, I decided I wanted to see if I had any biological siblings. Gibney with her birth mother, Patricia during their first reunion meeting in December 1994.
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